20 Bears

Friday, February 26, 2010

Chapter 2 and other stuff.

The Longest and Greatest Story of All Time:

Chapter 2

--As it Came to Pass that I Went To The Doctor and Bonded With 20 Bears All At Once.

I looked around the Doctor’s lab and saw lots of stuff that had blinky lights. That means they’re important or something. I read that once in a Japanese comic book encyclopedia.

The Doctor studied my twenty bears one at a time, pausing every once in a while to comment on how awesome they were. Finally, he looked up at me through thick, bottle cap glasses. “Well, you finally did it,” he said like a doctor.

“Told you I would.”

“Took you long enough,” he replied doctorly.

“Yeah, but it was worth it. We gonna do this or not?”

Doc frowned at me and adjusted that round, donut looking metal disc he wore on his forehead. It was like he was hoping I’d forget to ask. Too bad for him, I’ve never forgotten anything ever because I know how to read and fight.

“Bonding with the twenty bears is a very dangerous procedure. No one has survived the process. Are you sure you wish to proceed?” he said like someone who made a Hippocratic oath.

“I haven’t come this far to back out now.”

“Very well. Do you know the secret phrase of bear-bonding?” he asked medically.

“Of course.” I pulled a crumpled piece of paper from my pocket, read it aloud: “Bear-bonding…initiate!”

A storm manifested inside the laboratory. It rained and thundered and wind was blowing all over the place and bear hair was getting everywhere, shorting out those important blinky machines.

“You’ve done it!” Doc screamed like someone who decided from an early age to follow a career path helping others with their physical ailments, “You’ve done it!”

“This is for you, dad!” I shouted over the howling tempest.

As quickly as it had come, the storm dissipated.

“Now what?” I asked.

“Anything you want,” replied Doc. A tear welled in his eye, like the same way I imagined a proud father would look at his son after doing something awesome like punching an earthquake. “Anything you want.”

I knew exactly what I wanted. But I was gonna need a lot of courage and other positive qualities money to do it. And there’s only one place to get that kind of money.

“Come on, boys, we’re going to Hollywood!”

My bonded bears growled with delight.

But then I remembered something even more important than money: the Mega-Meteor!

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